Endings

 

This life is hard

It’s hard being alone

It’s hard being together

 

We have such power to hurt

Even when we’re just trying not to get hurt.

Especially then.

 

How does one heal such wounds?

Time doesn’t really help.

It just spreads it out.

Never really ending,

Just getting thinner.

 

When was it decided?

When was it over?

From the start?

 

Not many do-overs left.

Is it time to quit?

Or keep repeating the same mistakes?

 

How does one learn in this life?

One can learn how to be alone,

But how do you learn to be together?

 

Each piece has its own shape,

What are the chances

Of matching my edgees.

 

No ending here.

The pain is too thick today.

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About Newell Hendricks

I have lived a good life. Maybe a counterculture life, maybe a normal life. I have written operas, built houses, been involved with cross-cultural education between Latin America and the U.S, and hardly ever had a job I have helped raise two wonderful children with my amazing wife. It's been a good ride. And I go to church. I've just finished a book of stories from my life, I am still connected to an organization in Nicaragua that promotes sister relationships between communities, faith communities, or schoold, and to the extent that my cancer doesn't pull me down, am attempting to share some of what I have learned, or at least tried out. Welcome, and let's share.
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4 Responses to Endings

  1. What you are feeling, as you describe the pain of broken edges and shattered pieces, a broken soul tie, is similar to what survivors feel who have been estranged by their spouse, churches, friends, and families. There is no pain quite so piercing as the ending of a relationship that has been fruitful and satisfying.

    You remind us that friendships, no matter how solid, are fragile. None of us can guarantee we will be faithful or that we won’t hurt our loved ones. Sometimes we hurt without realizing it; other times we are wounded and no one notices.

    You are a man of “covenant love” and so the piercing is that much sharper. The not understanding why, the lack of real closure, as many of us experience, shreds our souls. You open your heart to all of us and freely give unconditional love and acceptance. Thank you for being here, for writing, for inspiring, and for helping to point us to the Way, the Truth, and the Life. I pray this Life and all of our Love fills you to overflowing, comforts you, and brings you shalom.

    As you sleep, may you feel the heartbeat of the Rabbi who was also pierced… and receive His comfort. Thank you for sharing your heart with us… I hope in some measure our heart shared back with you will give you comfort in your grief.

    Like

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